Stressed out? Overwhelmed? Feeling a bit Crazy?

Holidays making you a little crazy??

Don't fret, there's hope! (Really) There's one week to go....here are a few tips that can help get you through the holidays without a visit from the men in white coats.

1. Breathe.......breathe in for 5 counts, hold for 5 counts and breathe out for 5 counts. Do this at least 3 times to keep oxygen in your body and to slow down!
2. Do at least one thing for yourself each day - call a friend, take a bath, meet a friend over coffee or glass of wine, have your kids or spouse rub your feet or give you a mini-massage. (I'm heading out soon to have lunch with my husband!)
   
3. Check your list and make sure you do the things you love to do and see which items you can forego this year, delegate to someone else, or streamline. (I don't bake, I'm not doing any outside lights this year and I may not get my cards out til New Years!)
4. Stop periodically to practice gratitude...notice the beauty around you, your friends, family, health, etc. Time passes too quickly, don't miss the goodies.
5. Remember-what you get done, you get done. Christmas will come whether you're ready or not.
   

The Grinch couldn't keep Christmas from coming, so who are we to question little Cindy Lew Who, "the best gift isn't from the store or under the tree, it's enjoying the important people in your life!"

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

BTW-give yourself something to look forward to AFTER the holidays: De-stress, relax and get energized for great things in 2010! Register for my retreat! Go to link: Women's Retreat for more info. or to register!

Vitamin N for More Balance and Less Stress

I did a presentation today talking about my 5 Strategies for a Stress-Free Holiday. It went well and I think my favorite part was listening to the strategies audience members are already using to help make the holiday season more manageable and more fun. Here are a few of the ideas:

• Take everyone bowling or to a movie together
• Strategize and have a budget and plan before you shop.
  
• Adjust your activities to match the age group
• Plan low-keyed activities without the demands of elaborate events
  

My favorite suggestion and one I hadn't heard before was to take Vitamin N. What's vitamin N? Saying NO! What a great concept! So here's the general idea as the holidays get closer.....You don't have to do it all. Do what you love and what family members love and let the rest go. The more you try to meet everyone's expectations the less manageable and enjoyable the holidays will be. Your joy of the holidays is at least as important as everyone else's. Taking care of yourself and learning to say no will help you avoid the overwhelm and stress that is often part of the holidays.

Enjoy the holidays and don't forget to take your Vitamins!!

This Is Your Life (and Holiday)....Make it What You Want!

10 Tips for a Stress Free Holiday

The holiday season is one of the most stressful times of year for many people. It’s a classic example of how we ask too much of ourselves and of others.

November comes around and suddenly we expect to turn into “Martha Stewart!” We want a beautifully decorated house, delicious homemade treats, perfect, well thought out personalized gifts and well-behaved, eternally grateful children......even after we’ve disrupted their sleep routines, filled them up with sugar and drug them to relatives' houses they only see once a year!

So how do you avoid making the holidays humbug? Here are some tips:

1. Ask each family member what their number one favorite part of the holiday is and only do those. You don’t have to do everything! You might be surprised that there are some things that aren’t as important as you thought.

2. Skip the holiday cards-send New Years cards in January or Valentine cards in February when you have more time. When you send something later, people are more likely to read it. If you send cards and family updates in January or February there’s a better chance they’ll remember what it said.

3. Give theme gifts: magazine subscriptions, donations in their name, gift cards, tickets to a concert, movie, play, etc. Go through a list of magazines and choose one that fits each person on your list. Think about their favorite store, go online and order a gift card for them. Give them tickets to an event you both like and maybe they’ll share the second ticket-the gift that keeps on giving.

4. Go to bed for a nap after Thanksgiving Dinner and set the alarm for midnight New Year's Eve. Thought I’d toss that in for fun.

5. Make a list before shopping! Nothing is more time consuming and crazy making than wandering around the mall waiting for the perfect gift to jump out at you or having so many gifts jumping out at you that you feel like your brain will explode! Go through catalogs or magazines for ideas, decide what you want and buy only what’s on your list, or better yet, do all your shopping online!

6. Go shopping with a friend and combine it with a massage, spa treatment, sauna or a soak in a hot tub. Wouldn't it be great to shop for an hour or two and follow it with a great meal or spa date afterwards!

7. Breathe……breathe…….breathe. A deep breath will help you slow down to think and make better decisions. You know that last minute craziness that happens right before guests arrive-your mind races and you're bouncing from one thing to another. Then the door bell rings. STOP! Take a deep breath and your mind and body will automatically slow down. What's done is done....let it go.

8. Make the holiday meal a group event: ask guests to bring part of the meal. If you are hosting an event, let guests know up front that you are happy to provide the main dish and assign or let them choose a side dish to bring. Then they don't need to bother with a hostess gift either. And really, how many candles or cute knick knacks do you need?

9. Schedule FUN things for yourself as well as the kids. While you do lots for your families and friends this time of year, don’t forget to do something for yourself-go to a movie, buy yourself a little gift, hang out with a friend, go skiing or try something you’ve always wanted to do. This is your holiday, too. You deserve to have some fun!

10. And finally, borrowed from professional organizers, do only the things you need to do and the things you love to do. Let go of the rest. What traditions do you love and which ones feel like chores? Going back to Tip #1 - only do the number one favorites. And don’t forget, your favorites count as well-it's the ultimate self-care. (Actually, your favorites count more because "when mama ain't happy, nobody's happy!")

Bottom line....do activities you truly love and you'll be energized and happy. How can you enjoy the true meaning of the holidays, whatever that means for you, if you're stressed out and exhausted! Have a happy holiday, you deserve it!

Free Call-10 Tips for Stress-free Holiday

Free-Teleclass! Spa for Your Soul

Make Your Holiday Season
More Happy and Less Hectic!

Tuesday, November 3rd at 7 PM Central

The holiday season is one of the most stressful times of year, especially for women.
It’s a classic example of expecting too much from yourself!

Is this you?

November comes around and you have more “to do’s” to add to your already long list of everyday chores and responsibilities: gifts, dinners, decorating, baking, parties, religious programs, school programs, planning for guests, plans for travel, working out schedule with extended family,

2 weeks of kids being home from school, etc.

Plus, there is an expectation that everyone become the local “Martha Stewart”….by having a beautifully decorated home, delectable homemade cookies, perfect, well thought out personalized gifts and well-behaved, eternally grateful children......even after their routine is disrupted, they’ve filled up with cookies, candy and enough stimulus tilt a pinball machine!!

So here’s the question….

What do YOU want for the Holidays?

On Tuesday, November 3rd at 7 PM Central Time

Spa for Your Soul Coach, Mary Kay Aide will share

10 tips to make your holiday more happy and less hectic!

You deserve to enjoy the holidays as much as anyone else and
you will learn to make that happen by following these tips.

This is the perfect time to put together a plan to ward off holiday stress
and enjoy the holidays the way you want!

The holidays have special meaning for everyone, full of gratitude, giving and celebration.

You can’t enjoy yourself when you’re stressed out and exhausted.

Register & make the 2009 Holiday Season the happiest and best one yet!

Sign up on the right for the number to get in on the call.

I did my best to schedule this call at a convenient time, so you'll be able to join us live-

I want you to have the opportunity to ask questions and get all you need.

However, if you just can't make the call live, be sure to sign up,

so you have access to the recording.

Looking forward to "seeing" you on Tuesday!!

Free Tele-class-It's Time for YOU!

Do you:

• Spend all your time and energy taking care of everyone else?
• Find yourself on the bottom of your priority list? (Are you even on the list?)
• Ever wonder when it’s going to be your turn?
• Know things need to change, but don’t know where to start?
• Feel like you’ve lost yourself?

If this sounds like you, this Spa for your Soul call is for you!

Five Tools to Rejuvenate your Life

Tuesday, October 27th Noon-1PM Central Time.

Sign up in the box to the right to get the call information, as well as my Spa for Your Soul e-newsletter and a BONUS mini e-course: "Creating more Balance and Meaning in Your Life!"

Listening live will give you an opportunity to get your own questions answered, but if you can't make the call live, that's fine. Register anyway and you will receive the link to listen to the call at your convenience.

Perhaps you have what looks like a dream life, but it doesn't feel very dream like!

Take a break from the many demands in your day and let

Spa for Your Soul help you feel like you just walked out of a beauty spa, energized and deserving of the life you want and deserve!

This free tele-class will introduce 5 Steps to Rejuvenate Your Life!

These doable, concrete and practical steps are designed to support and guide you as you focus on yourself, your values and the kind of life you want!

Registration is on the right and you'll receive the call information as well as a free subscription to my Spa for your Soul e-newsletter and as a BONUS-mini-ecourse: Creating more Balance and Meaning in your Life.

Put this call on your calendar....

Tuesday, October 27th Noon-1PM Central Time

Sign up now, it's only a few days away!!

The Ultimate Cure-The Ultimate Self-Care

"There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won't cure,
but I don't know many of them."
-- Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

I love this quote, but for some reason I’ve never written about it. I’d look at it, ponder about it, then move on to something else. Promoting a hot bath as the ultimate cure of anything seemed a little too decadent or too simple or something.

It’s strange because, here I am, a proclaimed “self-care specialist” and I’ve avoided writing about one of life’s greatest pleasures, a hot bath. What’s THAT all about? Hot baths have been around for a very long time. It’s a fabulous, yet inexpensive way to practice self-care.

Remember the old Calgon commercials? For those of you who are a bit younger than me, it featured a woman escaping into a hot bubble bath with the phrase, “Calgon, take me away!”
How many times do you see someone soaking in a bubble bath surrounded with candles, listening to music and savoring the moment….not in person perhaps (!), but on TV, in the movies, etc.

I would guess that we think about doing it for ourselves many more times than we actually do it. I know lots of people that were so excited to put a spa tub in their new bathroom anticipating long luxurious baths and then later report they hardly use it!

Is that you? If it’s not a hot bath you put off, maybe it’s scheduling a massage or coffee with a friend or any number of fabulous self-care activities.

So what gets in the way of you taking the steps to take care of yourself? Do you, like me, think it’s too decadent or too easy of a solution? How often do you think about how great it would be to pamper yourself a little bit, but there’s just one more thing to get done, one more chore, one more project one more phone call.

What makes you think that your self-care belongs on the bottom of your priority list? I challenge you to move your self-care up the list. You deserve it. As Stuart Smalley says, “You’re good enough, you’re smart enough and gosh darn it, people like you!!”

Be your own best friend and tell yourself that it’s time to allow some regular self-care in your life. Put it on your schedule and do it!! Let me know what self-care activities you plan to include in the next few days.

This is your life……make every day a spa day!

Extreme Self-Care & Life Balance-Things We Can Learn from a Dog

My dog, Penny Lane, will be 1 year old on October 13th.
She knows all about having balance in her life and practicing extreme self-care!

Here she is at 2 and 9 months old.

Happy Birthday, Penny!

Things We Can Learn from a Dog:*

1. Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joy ride.
   
2. Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.
   
3. When loved ones come home, always run and greet them.
   
4. When it’s in your best interest, practice obedience.
   
5. Let others know when they have invaded your territory.
   
6. Take naps and stretch before rising.
   
7. Run, romp, and play daily.
   
8. Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.
   
9. Be loyal.
   
10. Never pretend to be something you’re not.
    
11. If what you want is buried, dig until you find it.
    
12. When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle him or her gently.
    
13. Thrive on attention.
    
14. Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
    
15. On hot days, drink lots of water and sit under a shady tree.
    
16. When you’re happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
    
17. Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
    
18. No matter how often you are scolded, don’t buy the guilt thing and pout—run right back and make friends.
    
    (*borrowed from The Networking Survival Guide: Getting Success You Want by Tapping into the People You Know by Diane Darling)

Comparing Your Insides with Everyone Else's Outsides

Comparing Your Insides with Others' Outsides-A Losing Proposition

• Ever find yourself thinking that everyone else is more "together" than you?
• Do you believe other people are naturally are more confident, smart, balanced and sane?

Welcome to the human race!! It's understandable to think other people are doing better than you because you are looking at their outside personas. You don't see the stuff that's going on inside.

Think about it. You go to a party and you see how clean and attractive their home is. You get holiday cards in the mail and see the lovely photos, read about the great things they are doing, how smart and accomplished their kids are etc.

What you don't see is what the house looked like before they got ready for the party, how the kids spent the morning of the photo fighting and it's a constant stuggle to get the kids to do their homework!!

And you know what? They probably think the same thing about you! Your house looks pretty good when you have guests. I'm sure your holiday cards focus on the positives in your family life. Who wants to hear about bad stuff?

Here's what's happening, you may feel inferior to others because you are comparing your insides-the doubts, the flaws, the nitty gritty of life, to everyone elses' outsides and it's a no-win situation!! No wonder you feel inferior!

It's not fair to put yourself in that situation. Before you put yourself down, remember that they have lots of stuff going on inside that you don't know about. (That's why we like to hear the gossip about the rich and famous-it normalizes them!) If you really want to compare yourself with another, compare the "inside" information as well as the "outside" so you're on the same level.

The good news about sharing all parts of ourselves is that mutual authenticity and openness creates more honest and real relationships! And who doesn't want that?

This Is Your Life....Make It What You Want!

Autobiography in 5 short chapters

An Autobiography in Five Short Chapters
-Anonymous
I.
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost……I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
II.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in this same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
III.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit……but
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is MY fault.
I get out immediately.
IV.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
V.
I walk down another street.

De-clutter and Take Charge of Your Life

Are you in charge of your life?

Are there people or situations that can easily distract you or bring you down? Do they feel like they are running your life? Some are easy to recognize, others not. If you want to be living a more productive, healthy or purposeful life, perhaps a little "de-cluttering" can help.

• What things in your life drain you of energy and prevents you from doing your best?
• What are some things you simply put up with because it seems easier at the time?
• Are there people or situations in your life that do not serve you well?
  

Here's a really simple exercise that will help you begin the de-cluttering process.

1. Draw a line down the middle of a piece of paper.
2. On the top of one column put "Energy Drainers At Work."
3. On top of the other column put "Energy Drainers At Home."
4. List the situations, people, things that are energy drainers in your life.
   

Hang on to the list, you can add more as they come up. You may or may not choose to do anything about the items on your lists right now, but just becoming aware of the energy drainers will bring them to the forefront where you'll naturally start eliminating, fixing or resolving them.

You don't realize how much power you have until you take a look at the power you're giving away. Now is an excellent time to clear out the clutter and take charge of your life.

Happy Cleaning!

This Is Your Life....Make It What You Want!

Space and Stillness is Good for the Soul

"Space and stillness is the light that illuminates the beauty of our Souls being."-- Adyashanti

Imagine quiet and stillness....space to think...space to ponder on things without interruptions. How often does that happen for you? What would it be like to experience that kind of self-care?

Between I-phones, Ipods, TV, computers and the rest of the noise in our lives, space and stillness is a foreign concept for many of us. To balance our lives more, we're left to find our “space” in more creative ways. Have you ever stayed up too late, sacrificing valuable sleep, because it's the only time the house is quiet and you have some time for yourself? Or maybe it's been such a long time since silence was a part of your life that the idea of it makes you a bit uneasy.

I remember my experience on a 4 day schooner cruise last summer, which included no electronics of any kind-the boat didn’t even have a motor! I remember the restlessness I felt the first day. We’d had breakfast, the sails were up and we were underway. Now what? What do I do first? Read? Sleep? Journal? So many choices, so little time. I felt the need to actively relax.........actively relax.....isn’t that an oxymoron?

Before long, I was able to slow down and find a new rhythm for my day. I was able to truly relax which allowed me to live in the moment. I savored the quiet conversation, reading, napping or sitting on deck watching the waves and listening to the sounds of nature.

For me, the biggest thing I noticed, besides the fabulous food and beautiful scenery was how I appreciated the simplicity of our days. I had time to ponder my life, my priorities and appreciate what I have.

We all deserve those kinds of moments. Time away from your normal routine is a wonderful opportunity to stay connected to yourself, your values and your priorities. While you may not have the time or resources for an extended retreat, there are many ways to create mini-retreats in your day even if it's nothing more that taking 15 minutes a day to sit quietly in your favorite chair with a cup of tea or taking a quiet walk in your neighborhood.

Whatever way you choose to do it, my hope is that you find some way to create the stillness that can illuminate the beauty of your souls being.

This Is Your Life....Make it What You Want!

FREE TELE-CLASS: Spa for Your Soul

FREE TELE-CLASS

Spa for Your Soul

Five Tools to Rejuvenate Your Life, Focus on You & Create more Balance

Tuesday, July 28 Noon-1 PM

Do you:

Feel like you’re always behind? Get no time for YOU? Feel guilty at work because there’s so much to do at home, and guilty at home because there’s so much to do at work?

Is this you?

You have many wonderful things in your life…….kids, a partner, career, faith community, volunteer work, friends, etc., but you are so busy you can’t enjoy it. And on top that, you may guilty because you are living a dream life, but it doesn’t feel very dream like.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!! There are so many people, especially women, who feel this way and believe there’s not a way out of being stressed-out.

Believe it or not, you don’t have to make dramatic changes to be able to really enjoy your dream life. Schedule an appointment with Spa for Your Soul! It really is possible, even in these busy times, to feel fulfilled, contented and happy. I have created a five spa “services” that will help you “massage” your life a little for better self-care, balance and fulfillment.

Join me on Tuesday, July 28th Noon-1PM to learn how you, too, can enjoy your dreamlife with more balance and manageability. Take time to relax, focus on your needs and feel good about yourself!

RSVP:

Email me marykay@lifecoachmkay.com for instructions for the call.

If you are interested and can’t make the call, RSVP anyway. The call will be recorded, I’ll send you the link and you can listen to it at your convenience!