Ultimate Self-Care-Find Your "Wilderness"

Where's your wilderness?

I just returned from my annual women’s wilderness canoe trip in northern Minnesota. We drove to Grand Marais, MN on the north shore of Lake Superior, head inland on the Gunflint Trail and put in our canoes, loaded with all our gear and food, and head out for three nights in the Boundary Waters Canoe Area wilderness.

You might wonder what the appeal is of going that far away to sleep on the ground, carry all our food and gear on our backs and portaging canoes. (I know my mother does!) For one, it’s gorgeous, unspoiled, wilderness….lakes connected to one another by only portage trails. There are no buildings, no motors, no cell phones, no computers. I believe airlines are even restricted from flying over that area to avoid disturbing the quiet.

For another, it’s very simple living. Day to day activities are reduced to the simplest of duties: preparing meals, rest, contemplation, reading, fishing, swimming, watching wildlife, paddling. There is no need to rush about because there are no schedules. You don’t need a watch because the days are ruled by the sun. You get up when it’s light and you go to bed when it’s dark, after enjoying the campfire and gazing at the stars. It’s easy to enjoy the sounds of nature, the clean air and water. There’s nothing like savoring the food, the tranquil moments and the companionship of friends.

The only problem with spending time in the wilderness is the culture shock when I return! After you return from a relaxing vacation, how can you practice some of that mindfulness and relaxation in your “real” life? How can you savor anything in the midst of traffic, cell phones, computers, and the infinite number of demands?

As I write this, I find myself pondering my wilderness experience and automatically I find myself there…..I can feel myself relax, my breathing has slowed, I’m absorbing the view out my window and noticing the sun shining in the flowers outside my window. It’s lovely and quite calming.

I understand that you may not have experienced the wilderness, but I bet you’ve been someplace that is relaxing and enjoyable.

Where is your “wilderness?”

• Take yourself to that relaxing place in your mind


• Allow yourself to relax into the moment.


• Go where you can unwind


• Let go of the distractions around you
  

We all need to visit the “wilderness” and inner selves to slow down and become more at peace with the world. What would it take to get you there in your mind?

My request for you is to experience your “wilderness” every day even for just a moment or two and give yourself a break from your “real” world. You deserve it.

This Is Your Life....Make It What You Want!

Comparing Your Insides with Everyone Else's Outsides

Comparing Your Insides with Others' Outsides-A Losing Proposition

• Ever find yourself thinking that everyone else is more "together" than you?
• Do you believe other people are naturally are more confident, smart, balanced and sane?

Welcome to the human race!! It's understandable to think other people are doing better than you because you are looking at their outside personas. You don't see the stuff that's going on inside.

Think about it. You go to a party and you see how clean and attractive their home is. You get holiday cards in the mail and see the lovely photos, read about the great things they are doing, how smart and accomplished their kids are etc.

What you don't see is what the house looked like before they got ready for the party, how the kids spent the morning of the photo fighting and it's a constant stuggle to get the kids to do their homework!!

And you know what? They probably think the same thing about you! Your house looks pretty good when you have guests. I'm sure your holiday cards focus on the positives in your family life. Who wants to hear about bad stuff?

Here's what's happening, you may feel inferior to others because you are comparing your insides-the doubts, the flaws, the nitty gritty of life, to everyone elses' outsides and it's a no-win situation!! No wonder you feel inferior!

It's not fair to put yourself in that situation. Before you put yourself down, remember that they have lots of stuff going on inside that you don't know about. (That's why we like to hear the gossip about the rich and famous-it normalizes them!) If you really want to compare yourself with another, compare the "inside" information as well as the "outside" so you're on the same level.

The good news about sharing all parts of ourselves is that mutual authenticity and openness creates more honest and real relationships! And who doesn't want that?

This Is Your Life....Make It What You Want!